Sunday, March 29, 2009

I'm Dancing In The Rain

I was watching the movie, 'The Clique' the other night (don't ask me why), and there were a group of friends having a sleepover when one of the girls asked the other “which would you rather be…a friendless loser or have a bunch of friends that secretly hate you?”I never thought of people in that way, and this question really got me thinking of friendships. So before I answer that question for myself, this is what I came up with.....
In order to have friends, you have to be one! Friendship is one of the most precious gifts in life. Regardless of any situation, you should be able to trust your friends. Everyone makes mistakes and all friends have their battles but for the most part, friends should never hurt you. Lies and betrayals have no place in a lasting friendship. When you are someone's friend you should be honest with them and they should be able to be honest with you, even if that means they tell you something you might not want to hear. Confiding in friends should not be something that makes you wonder if your secrets are safe. Trusting your friend enough to ask about what you heard and know they will answer truthfully no matter how bad is a sure sign of trust, loyalty, and security.
Why is that so hard to do people????
So, to answer the question….I would rather be a friendless loser, I only say loser because that is the way the question was asked. I know that having good friends is an important staple in everyone’s life, but I also know that there are boundaries that you must set for yourself and not allow people to take advantage of you. I feel it’s important to teach this to my children as well. I don’t force friends upon my kids just because the weather is nice and they need someone to play with or because everyone else is playing outside. True lasting friendships begin at any age but prove themselves as the years pass. I feel that teaching my kids how to be a loyal friend will give them REAL friends in the end.
Just the other day at school Naty overheard two girls picking on one of her classmates and immediately jumped in front of the two girls and told them they were being very rude and that they should treat people the way that they wanted to be treated. She comforted her classmate and stayed with her to make sure that those mean girls left her alone. It makes me so proud to know as a parent that I am doing something right, to know that my kiddos have enough confidence in themselves to help others.
I stumbled across this famous quote one day and have lived by it ever since:
Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
It's about learning how to dance in the rain!!!!

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