Putting the self back in mySELF

I think about this topic a lot. Yes, having kids changes EVERYTHING and in the most fundamental of ways.

Nearly three years ago, my husband and I moved to a city where we could be in a great school district, I changed careers so I could have more time with my kids, and the day-to-day routines of our lives revolve pretty much entirely around the kids schedules. These are big, concrete changes. But what changes even more, I think, is how I, as a parent, feel, think, evaluate, plan. But what I find ridiculous is that sometimes, as a mother, your interests, priorities, desires come second to your kids. I did it for the first few years of being a parent. I didn’t go for walks, didn’t go out with my husband, didn’t read books or go to the gym during the day. I was miserable and then finally I realized that losing myself to becoming a parent wasn’t doing anyone, including my kids, any good.
Yes, as a parent, my priorities are different, my day-to-day is different, and I worry all the time. But I make time to go for friends and adlut time, going for walks because it makes me healthy and happy, I try to find time to read and go out with my husband and pursue a demanding career that I love. I also sneak some time in for a mani/pedi, haircut, and shopping splurge every now and then. It all takes an effort and and no, I am nowhere near having enough time or energy for all things “me”, but I’m not all lost in the parenting identity either.