My NCLEX experience

I won’t write about the days leading up to NCLEX as they can be described in one word: INSANE.
So, I arrived early to the testing facility. When I arrived on the eighth floor, the door to the testing center was locked and had a sign that said please wait for a representative to open the doors at 7:25.
I immediately starting speaking to another person waiting to take her exam. She was taking a pharmacy tech exam and was also just as nervous as I was. Except when I am nervous, I can’t stop talking…and because I left my phone in the car, this poor pharmacy girl was my victim. I learned many things about her: where she lived, went to school, kids, everything…….but, should have known by her short answers that I maybe I should maybe leave her alone…..I didn’t.
I was trying to get my mind at ease before they opened the doors to the testing center and this poor girl amused me.
Finally 7:30am the doors opened and we were asked to get a number and wait for our number to be called. I jumped at number 1, I can’t wait any longer than I already have to. There was a lady seated attentively and upright behind a desk. She looked up at me as I entered and sat. After I'd arranged myself in the chair, she called ‘number one please”.
Yes, I explained, that’s me.
She asked me what exam I was here to take, and I felt the tears welling up as I said, I am here to take my NCLEX exam.
"Your authorization to test and ID, please."
"Empty your pockets, take off your watch, and leave everything in this basket, grab a locker and keep the locker key with you. Please take this paper and read it. I will call you in a few minutes."
She was a very formal business woman, whose tone was as crisp as her pristine ironed shirt.
I sat and tried to read the paper regarding NCLEX exam policies and violations when I touched the cross pendant on my necklace (to say a little prayer) and my necklace broke. As I held the small crucifix in my hand I thought to myself - oh no, this is not a good sign. I’ve never worn this necklace before and the cross pendant was a graduation gift also not worn yet. I asked and was told that I was not allowed to carry my necklace in my pocket, I had to lock it up with the rest of my things (which consisted of a water bottle and set of keys), so I did.
When the woman was ready for me, I had to sign my name, let her finger print me, scan my palm 5 times, get my photo taken, sign my name again, lock up my things, on and on and on. Finally she gathered my papers, scanned my finger one last time, and walked with me two steps into the hallway.
There was a woman seated in the monitoring station, watching the test takers. Though calling it a monitoring station is a kind of visual understatement. Her station looked upon so many screens. She informed me that I would be monitored at ALL times by video and speaker. Yep, they can hear you breathe as you take your exam! WOW!
She took my ID as well, scanned my fingerprint, activated my test in the computer, and escorted me inside to my terminal. I noted that I was seated at computer #8, right smack dab in the middle of the room. I guess that’s what I get for grabbing that #1 ticket.
When the test finally began, it looked exactly like the review books describe them. I didn't feel nervous at that time. I felt like I had a really good chance.
Until I got terrified…..
I felt the exam was very difficult and then it cut off at 75. What? NO! I'm not done, I need more time. I was already crying so the tears just continued to flow. I had to raise my quivering hand to inform the lady that I was finished and to be escorted out and she scanned my fingerprint and palm again so I could leave.
I cried all the way to my car, I called hubby…no answer. Called my sister…no answer. called parents…..no answer. Called friends….no answer. ughhh. I needed to vent, where is everybody?
I checked the testing website and for some strange reason, my results had posted….I PASSED!
So, I cried even more.
I called a classmate/friend and we laughed and shared stories all the way home. She made me feel so much better. Thank you, Mispa!
Oh, and my broken necklace….it was a sign….a good one. That the Lord was with me that day like I asked him to and he was going to get me through this!
Studying nursing has been good for me in so many ways, I've grown past anxieties and gained a measure of self-confidence. The changes were subtle and slow, but when I look back, I'm amazed at how far I've come.
Finding a path in life that both complements and challenges you is a gift. In this crazy world, I was lucky that my ambition in life actually worked for me. I have shaped my character and strengthened my identity. Of course, it was tedious and downright depressing.
But here I am now, with a degree and initials after my name. After all of it... after everything... I made it.

TGIF

Every Friday, no matter how hectic or stressful the week has been, my family has a tradition to celebrate the weekend’s start. I crack open a bottle of wine and we all roll up our sleeves in the kitchen. Everyone likes homemade pizza: I make/buy fresh dough for the pizza crust, and my husband chops, sautés, and grates the toppings and, the kids have fun making their own special pizzas.
On good weeks I’d make home-made sauce and we have fresh mozzarella. But, over the last year it went from rolling dough to buying premade pizza dough to getting the entire pizza delivered, hot n’ ready. But, when we then sit down to eat, either at the dining table, or on the porch, it’s our family time that matters. So, none the less, our tradition is still alive. It’s a great start to the weekend.
This little tradition of ours isn’t complex or costly, and it takes no advanced planning. It's just something we all look forward to, and it’s become a little something that says “home” to us.

I'm Pinned

I consider myself to be crafty. I am a whiz at sewing, I can paint, scrapbook, photograph, I make cards and paper crafts, I cook, bake, decorate and design......yep, I'm one crafty mom.

But, there are times when I just lose that creative juice inside of me and I sit in my craft room and am truly stumped! I don't like those moments at all. This is not supposed to happen to a crafty person, right? Well, it does! and with my busy schedule lately, I have these crazy un-crafty moments, more and more.

Well, I have a feeling things may be a little different from now on.....thanks to Pinterest.

Pinterest is my inspiration, when mine is lost. When I want to relax or enjoy some me time, I turn on my computer or pick up my phone and navigate my way to Pinterest. I browse boards to see what random people from across the world are pinning. I go through my own boards to feel inspired and see what things have caught my eye in past months.

I have boards for every aspect of my life- recipes, decorating, holiday and gift ideas, art projects to try with my littles, and even an entire board dedicated to outfits. One day I hope to have my home entirely remodeled like the pins I have on Pinterest.

I think that Pinterest will help me not lose my creative brain the next time I am pregnant. Hopefully, the boards that I have worked so hard to create will inspire me and keep my crafty mom side working despite what my busy life brings.

Time after time....

I have what I think could be considered an “obsessive personality.” I know it, I recognize it and….I it. It’s what brings out spontaneity in me, what drives me to push myself beyond the norm, it’s what gets me out of the rut that we all fall into. It’s why I started and continued house projects. It’s why I write and blog. It’s why I scrapbook. Why my house is so organized. And more importantly why I am the mother that I have become. Ever since having kids, I find time slips through my fingers faster than it ever did. 
I love and appreciate all the relationships in my life but I admit, I’m not always present to those around me. Maybe it’s part of my personality to ponder, reflect and contemplate about life. Sometimes I forget that everyday life has its own richness of taste, feel and touch. When I let myself be in touch with my kids, is when I see their imagination taking them to far-off places. They’re writing plays with their friends, talking with each other about what they’re wearing, how they’re getting to school, family vacations, and what spend their allowances on. Through plenty of trial and error, I discovered something to be managed through choosing the right priorities for myself and my family….TIME.

Time is such a valuable gift. What we do with it is a gift to those around us. When one parent works 12 hour shifts and each kid has their own activities, time together can be an issue. But, I have not let that be an excuse. I have to say that thru all these stressful months of nursing school, moving, and soccer schedules, we have managed to have dinner together every evening. I’m grateful for my family and for the time I can spend with our kids now when they’re still young. Like many wise women tell me, they’re this young only once. Treasure these moments.
 My family and spiritual life are my highest priorities. I still have dreams and aspirations, and sometimes they take me to far-off places, taking more time than I’d like. Thankfully, the people in my everyday life keep me grounded.

Candy Corn Cookies

I found this recipe for these super cute cookies.
I'm planning on making them for our Halloween party.
Hope you enjoy the recipe!

1 pouch (1 lb 1.5 oz) Betty Crocker® sugar cookie mix
1/3 cup butter or margarine, melted
1 egg
Orange paste food color
2 oz semisweet chocolate, melted, cooled

1. Line 8x4-inch loaf pan with waxed paper, extending paper over sides of pan. In medium bowl, stir cookie mix, butter and egg until soft dough forms.
2. On work surface, place 3/4 cup dough. Knead desired amount of food color into dough until color is uniform. Press dough evenly in bottom of pan.
3. Divide remaining dough in half. Gently press one half of remaining dough into pan on top of orange dough. On work surface, knead chocolate into remaining dough until color is uniform. Press over plain dough in pan, pressing gently to edge of pan. Refrigerate 1 1/2 to 2 hours or until firm.
4. Heat oven to 375°F. Remove dough from pan. Cut crosswise into 1/4-inch-thick slices. Cut each slice into 5 wedges. On ungreased cookie sheet, place wedges 1 inch apart.
5. Bake 7 to 9 minutes or until cookies are set and edges are very light golden brown. Cool 1 minute; remove from cookie sheet. Cool completely. Store in tightly covered container.
Makes About 9 1/2 dozen cookies